Today’s category is TOP TEN. No unifying thread here…just the best of the best.
10. Badonk-A-Dunkel (Port): Port Brewing has lots of amusing names, but for my money, this is their finest. Fun to say. Fun image. And they even worked a beer pun in there. The best of all worlds.
9. Polygamy Porter (Wasatch): The best tag-line ever…”Why have just one?”
8. Smells Like Weed IPA (Dark Horse): No dicking around here…just telling it like it is.
7. Hoptimus Prime (Legacy): Hands down the best hop-related pun there is. Autobots transform and roll out! A shout-out to Doc for making the Aleheads aware of this one.
6. Hop Whore (Tyranena): Of course, even better than a hop-pun is a name that describes how much the beer likes to fuck hops for money.
5. Donkey Punch (Sweetwater): Sorry about your neck, honey.
4. Wizard Sleeve (Kuhnhenn): Arguably the best line in Borat. Look it up…
3. Nut Sack Ale (Boulevard): Mmm…your nut sack is delicious! Note: I recognize that the Top Ten names seem to skew towards the profane, but hopefully I can redeem myself with the final two which are entirely clean.
2. Tastes Like Burning (Ralph Wiggum’s Revenge) (Ithaca): I bent my Wookie! This almost took the #1 spot, but…
1. Up Up Down Down Left Right Left Right BA Select (Dogfish Head): It may look like gibberish, but to a certain generation of males, it’s the only practical way to defeat Red Falcon. I submit that the only way Dogfish Head could top this name is if they were to release a beer called “007-373-5963 Punch-Out Porter”.
And that’s all she wrote, folks. The Top 50 Beer Names. Let me know what I missed!